What do you want me to say?

What do you want to hear?

How much of what we say is to ensure that no one gets upset? Do we ever really express our true emotions when asked: how does that make you feel or how do you feel?

Whatever, it's a pointless debate on my behalf because I know I censor just about all of my responses to the appropriate emotional level of the conversation, even though I may feel more (or less) strongly (is that even a word?)

Right now I am having this inner debate about the difference about what I am feeling and what I am thinking. Of course, it's not the same. The worst part happens to be that I am more unsure of what I think than what I feel, but I can't describe how I feel. So when asked how do you feel, I don't have a clue what to say, except for stupid because I am so confused (and stupid overall).


On a different note, it has been forever since I picked up the phone and called my friends. That makes me a not so nice person. Why, you ask? Mostly because I catch myself so caught up in my day to day life, that at the end of the day I just want to sleep. So why don't I make time? Because I am the most irresponsible, thoughtless person ever. Are those my best excuses? yes, but they are not excuses, just really bad reasons.


Oh, and just in case anyone was wondering....it's October...Fall...aka "cold" outside. I can't believe I am going to have to start wearing sweaters again!!! I just barely put them away in May!! And that is all I have to say (censored and all.)