Get over it day

Here is my report:

So I was supposed to celebrate "Get over it day," but like everything else lately, I forgot. In retrospect I should do a better job of remembering things that are important. Regardless, I am now thinking of all those things I should get over immediately and the only one that comes to mind is about a boy. It is the boy I should have gotten over a very long time ago. At least 12 months ago. But for some reason or another I still think about him. Sure it might be hard to get over someone when you are forced to be in a small room with them at least 4 days a week. And it is kinda hard to not think about him when there are so many places around me that remind me of him.

I should be over him because he is not only not good for me, but he doesn't even care about me. Other than "loving me just as friends." So what am I going to do to get over him? Still working on that. Let you know what I come up with. I am kinda hoping that being away will help. I have a friend that says that distance helps. I hope he is right.

Today someone told me that she couldn't understand why I liked him in the first place. I can't explain alot of. Some of it is that he challenges me to think about everything I say and do. He questions me and pushes my buttons. He seems to understand parts of me that few people do. He is willing to not let me get away with crappy excuses. We could talk about random stuff and we share some life experiences that impact who we are and why we make the choices we do. And through it all, he puts up this wall. And I don't know what is behind it, but I know that he keeps it from me. And as he pushes me away, I wonder if it is that we are too much alike. I think that my obsession is because I think I can get to him like no one else can. I think I believe that I can save him from himself. I believe that I can be the one to make him grow up. It's silly and it's stupid to think you can be the one to change a boy that is not ready or willing to change. But I kinda do. But as I sit here I realize that he is not all I want. And while it may be the first time I say it out loud to myself, I am unlike to continue to believe it (I will probably deny it tomorrow). But the wrong guy at the wrong time or the right time is still the wrong guy. And my head may know he is the wrong guy, but my heart is still trying to catch up. I hope it does, and soon, because I really can't cry about him anymore. I don't want to cry for him anymore.

But on a different note -

For now I will leave you with some words that have made me think recently....


--'A guy and a girl can be just friends, but at one point or another, they will fall for each other. Maybe temporarily, maybe at the wrong time, maybe too late, or maybe forever'--Dave Matthews

--'There are only three things a girl needs in life. Boys, to make her weak. Alcohol, to make her strong. And good friends, to pick her up when they both make her hit the floor'

--No one falls in love by choice, it is by CHANCE.
No one stays in love by chance, it is by WORK.
And no one falls out of love by chance, it is by CHOICE.

--"Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back, even though you hung up on him, who thinks you are perfect even though he knows the worst things about you, who will stay awake just to watch you sleep. Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you're in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you're just as pretty without makeup, one who is constantly reminding you of how much he loves you and how lucky he is to have you. And the one who turns to his friends and says 'That's her'."


I know..I know...